If New Yorkers Ran Disney, We’d Have Classic Films Like Beauty and the...
White girl: … And then he took my camera and held it for me during the rest of the ceremony. He’s so sweet…Indian friend: Okay, seriously? That’s not romantic, that’s pockets!White girl: I guess...
View ArticleIt’s Like The Island Of Dr. Moreau Out There
Girl #1: Well, you and she have the same taste in men.Girl #2: Hmmm… That could be bad with y’all bein’ roommates and all.Girl #3: Eh, not really, because she likes Long Island boys, and I find them...
View Article…Unless They're Just There to Sell Speed. Fingers Crossed!
Drunk guy with baggy pants #1, watching two hot girls outside library: Daaamn!Drunk guy with baggy pants #2: Yeah, man!Drunk guy with baggy pants #3: Yeah, they're geeks, though.–Outside NYU Library
View ArticleI Want Him Home in His Jammies Playing Halo
Brunette: I would never date a guy who wears skinny jeans.Blonde: What's wrong with skinny jeans?Brunette: It means he's got fashion sense. I just don't need that. I would also never date a guy who's...
View ArticleWanna Be King Of England?
Teenage boy #1: I don't know, man. I mean, she's hot, but…Teenage boy #2: Dude, have you seen her? I would wring her socks out with my mouth.–20th St., Windsor TerraceOverheard by: Mel
View ArticleStory of My Life
Woman: He’s such a great guy. If he were taller, I’d marry him. I admire him so much, and he’s gorgeous. –Astoria Overheard by: Todd Seavey
View ArticleGreetings from the Freak Borough
JAP on cell: Yeah, he’s cute, but he’s from Staten Island!…Ever see that show on MTV, True Life: I’m Getting Married? Yeah, that guy was such trash, and everyone out there is like that! –Port Authority...
View ArticleA unique vocabulary
Hispter eating in Bonita in Williamsburg: “…and they have their own vocabulary, using phrases like, ‘hanging out.’”
View ArticleThe Implants Went Straight to Her Head
Hot chick: You know what? I hate all men. I have two nieces so I don’t even need to have kids. I can have sex any time I want, so I’m happy. –Art Gallery, SoHo Overheard by: Tibbie X
View ArticleWhat’s Your P-p-point?
Woman #1: That bad, huh? Woman #2: And he stutters. I just want to smack him over the head. Spit it out! –Bensonhurst
View ArticleGreat for Enticing Men with Little Debbie Complexes
Aspiring actress: I hope I get the part! That director was so hot! I could totally sleep with him!Friend: He’s your dad’s age.Aspiring actress: No! He’s 41. My dad’s 43.Friend: You’re 20.Aspiring...
View Article… When It Comes to Peristalsis
Man sunbather: He’s like 6’6″, very attractive…Woman sunbather: So does he, like, spontaneously vomit…?Man sunbather: Let’s just say he’s not the smoothest… –Turtle Pond, Central Park Overheard by: Not...
View ArticleThat’s about As Hot As I Can Take
Young college guy: Tell me about your friend. Is she hot?Girl: She sings sea shanties and goes to Brown.Young college guy: I’ll marry her. –La Mama, ETC Overheard by: sagacious man
View ArticleJust the Ear Buds
JAP #1: I think I’m going to break up with him. He really has, like, no money.JAP #2: Really?JAP #1: Yeah. He, like, doesn’t even have an iPod. –116th & Broadway
View ArticleI Gave Him My Best Parker Posey Lip Curl and Left the Train
Snooty alternative chick: So, for some reason I always get these creepy guys talking to me on the train. This one guy on the ride over here looked over at my iPod and I was listening to The Fall,...
View ArticleWednesday One-Liners Took “For Poorer” Out of Their Vows
Gold digger to friend: Yeah, I’m done with doctors. I want an architect. –E 80th St Overheard by: hannah g Annoyed JAP: So, he told me that I would date my way out of the Upper East Side. –Ladies’...
View ArticleHave I Got a Skank for You
Guy #1: I think I’m done dating girls that people have heard of.Guy #2: Duuude. –Barnes & Noble
View ArticleNowadays It’s 15 or Bust
Hipster guy: So I called him and he was like, ‘My mom is here!’ and I was like, ‘Can you bring her with you?’Hipster girl: Yeah, I don’t know… I’m not sure I could do it.Hipster guy: Really? Yeah,...
View ArticleJust the Ear Buds
JAP #1: I think I’m going to break up with him. He really has, like, no money.JAP #2: Really?JAP #1: Yeah. He, like, doesn’t even have an iPod. –116th & Broadway
View ArticleI Gave Him My Best Parker Posey Lip Curl and Left the Train
Snooty alternative chick: So, for some reason I always get these creepy guys talking to me on the train. This one guy on the ride over here looked over at my iPod and I was listening to The Fall,...
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